Category: Art of Living

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Art of Living Culture and Value

Sherman, His Horses and the Art of Living

By Henryk Rodakowski Public Domain Wikimedia Commons

In anticipation of the Kentucky Derby held on May 2 of this year, I wrote about how horses accompanied Sherman throughout his life.This year’s derby was a race of a lifetime, a horse with odds set to 30-1 coming from the rear to cross the finish line first. The horse’s trainer is a woman, the first to have a winner in ‘the run for the roses’. And this accomplishment merits its own story.

But I digress since this is not about the races of the Triple Crown. Besides, this year there won’t be a triple crowned winner since the Derby winner will forego the upcoming Preakness. Here I continue my reflection on Sherman, his horses, and what I’ve learned from both his experience and my own.

Finish of the 1827 St Leger. Matilda beats Mameluke
By John Frederick Herring, Sr. –

It’s said that one doesn’t become an equestrian until falling off a horse at least three times. I’ve fallen off three times. I may or may not have become a better rider, in each fall. But I have learned something more about myself.

The first fall was off a pony. I presumed I would be able to convey my intentions without the use of any aids, like a bridle or a saddle to keep me seated. What did I learn? The concept of ‘thinking before acting’. True, at the time, I was a kid, and the lesson didn’t stick in my thought process until much later.

The second fall was an attempt to jump. The horse was in perfect form. But I was not. I was insufficiently prepared. So I had an idea of what I wanted but didn’t have the skill to achieve it. The third time I slipped out of the saddle at the horse’s canter. The only explanation is that my body at the time was not strong enough to support me. I was recovering from an illness which depleted much of my energy. In my mind, I could do what I did before. But my body was suggesting something different, and I wasn’t paying attention.


Fortunately, many horses know what their riders can or cannot do. If they’re good-natured, they’ll accommodate themselves, despite the confusing cues received from the person on top of them. They do so to assure the safety of them both. Other times, though, they get spooked out for whatever reason or none at all. Then it’s up to the rider to help them alleviate their fears. I have found in those cases it helps to think of the ‘calm, cool, and collected’ mantra, while hoping that one’s mind, body, and spirit are stacked to generate that response. I’m fortunate when a horse and I are able to ride through a ride together through moments of uncertainty by remaining calm.

Miles From Home
By H. Bullock Webster –

Sherman had at least three falls and probably even more. I wrote about the first fall here. In his Memoirs he wrote about a fall which occurred while he was hunting in South Carolina. Apparently, he dislocated his shoulder. Years later during the famous Battle of Shiloh of the Civil War Sherman had three horses shot from under him. These horses ‘took the bullet’. It’s no wonder then that he would have a special bond with his war horses. How did Sherman feel when his horses perished in battle? He doesn’t say. But given the intensity of violence and the trauma that ensues, I’ll presume that he suffered from loosing his hoofed companions. Perhaps he realized that he was alive because of their fearlessness in battle mayhem.


He wrote to his wife Ellen about losing one of his favorite horses. Dolly, who was ‘stolen’ by the enemy (the horse was in transport on a supply train that was confiscated by the Confederates). But he joked that the enemy will be sorely disappointed when they realize that Dolly was not much of a battle horse as she bolted at the sound of gunfire. She preferred parades.


In their younger years, Sherman and Ellen enjoyed riding horseback through the countryside outside of Lancaster, Ohio. Sherman considered riding an important life skill and a necessary component to his children’s education. He wrote to his eldest daughter, Minnie encouraging her to continue advancing in horsemanship. He was proud of his ten-year-old son, Willie, riding alongside to ‘inspect the troops’ at the camp in Vicksburg.


Military training at West Point in mid 19th century included advanced equestrian skills, which Sherman and fellow officers in training took part. 40 years later, as a retired war general, Sherman voiced his objection when West Point scaled back courses in military equestrian skills. He argued that despite the advancement in artillery, training with horses taught transferable skills important in military strategy.

Sherman on his horse Duke Atlanta 1864, George N. Bernard Public Domain

Why did Sherman think horsemanship was still necessary? I’m not sure what he had in mind, but I’ll presume it has to do with the horse and rider analogies of Greek philosophy. Plato reworks earlier metaphors of a charioteer and his horses, to illustrate lessons in the pursuit of the good through correct reasoning and practice of virtue.
Horses have been necessary for human survival and flourishing for millennia. Up to as recently as early last century, humans relied primarily on horses to assist in transport and food production as well as military defense and conquest. It’s no wonder that thinkers observing horses and people together would come to insightful life lessons.


While perhaps no longer necessary for our survival, we can still learn from horses and benefit from their presence and interaction with them. Watch horses in motion as Leonardo daVinci clearly did, or watch a child interact with a pony to see what you can learn.

Charioteer of Cyzicus, Relief 6th Century CE,
By G.dallorto – Own work, CC BY-SA 2.5 Wikimedia Commons


Following his mentor Plato, Aristotle also uses examples of horses to underscore intricate and abstract concepts. He advances his predecessor’s metaphor of horse and charioteer to elucidate his thoughts on human activity, temperament, and ethics. It’s not difficult for us to reflect on what we observe in nature, horses included. Analogies help make concepts accessible. Aristotle’s contemporaries had firsthand knowledge of what makes for a “good horse” (one who is fit, gallops well, and is responsive to its rider in difficult situations) for “the excellence of the horse makes a horse both good in itself and good at running and carrying its rider and at awaiting the attack of the enemy”. Nichomachean Ethics Mkeon/Reeve 2001


Aristotle then gives examples of what makes for human excellence, for the virtue of [a person] also will be the state of character which makes one act well Nicomachean Ethics Bk II Ch 5 Here and elsewhere, Aristotle makes an important distinction between theoretical knowledge and practical knowledge, the latter leading to skill acquired through practice and experience. We have opportunities to watch a good horse and skilled jockey running at full gallop at the race tracks that comprise the Triple Crown. But that will not make us better riders. We need practice, what the Greeks called (φρόνησις) phronesis or practical wisdom.


As AI provides information generating vast amounts of contextual knowledge, the ability to make such distinctions in human activity becomes more critical. It’s one thing to ‘know’ what human excellence; what the ancient Greeks called ἀρετή arete, should look like and another to know how to live accordingly through intentional practice.

I consulted ChatGPT to explain these distinctions. It did so in less than a second. But while its computational algorithms provided me with a certain amount of reliable information, it’s up to me to evaluate the information and to decide to how to respond.

Further, I need to make a decision to strive for excellence or ‘the good’ and then practice doing so Practiced excellence comes not only from an idea of what it should look like but also knowledge gleaned from the hard task of ‘doing the work’ to achieve it.


Sherman and his contemporaries learned such lessons in the art of living in part from the patient horses that accompanied the

True, we also need teachers to deepen the learning process and guides to encourage us. Further, horses feature less or not all in many people’s day to day experience. And even with support we have from the environment and people around us we may find that the challenges in life exceed are present capacities and skill sets. That’s when it helps to think about what horses can teach us.

The 20th century philosopher Ludwig Wittgenstein from his own experience puts it succinctly:

“I sit astride life like a bad rider on his mount. I owe it solely to the horse’s good nature that I am not thrown off right now.”
L. Wittgenstein 1939-1940

Horse and Dog
By Alfred Steinacker Wikimedia Commons

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Art of Living Culture and Value

Sherman and His Horses: Early Years

Family and friends knows that I have an affinity for horses. My earliest memories revolve around them. As a toddler, I was fascinated by my rocking horse. At the age of four, I had my first ride on a real horse. I was hooked. My mother took me to a nearby park, and I was placed on a Shetland pony that seemed to have its own mind as it trotted off to its friends in the pasture. I was saddened when a few years later, my mother told me the stable burned down, and some of the horses had perished. Others, she said, survived because they were blindfolded by rescuers and led past the flames to safety. I wondered if the pony I rode was a among the survivors. A few years later as a ten-year-old, I happily took note that the origin of my family’s surname means “lover of horses.” And shortly thereafter I looked forward to watching on TV the annual spring races of thoroughbred colts with their riders contending for the Triple Crown. The energy, focus and synergy of beauty motion continues to reminds of what I love about horses. That’s why I’m writing about Sherman and his horses now.

Sherman begins his first chapter of “Memoirs” with his earliest memory as a seven-year-old. He describes how he and his older brothers would wait for their father’s return from his trips as a circuit judge in rural Ohio. The passage, typical of Sherman’s humor and irony, is too delightful to omit and so I include it here:

My memory goes back to about 1827, Sherman writes. “I recall [my father] returning on horseback, when all the boys used to run and contend for the privilege of riding his horse from the front door to the back stable. On one occasion, I was the first and being mounted rode to the stable; but “Old Dick” was impatient because the stable-door was not opened promptly, so he started for the barn of our neighbor; there also, no one was in waiting to open the gate, and, after a reasonable time “Dick” stared back for home somewhat in a a hurry and threw me among a pile of stones in front of preacher Wright’s house where I was picked up apparently a dead boy; but my time was not yet, and I recovered, though the scars remain to this day. Memoirs of Gen. W.T. Sherman Vol I From 1820 to the Mexican War

Several years later, Sherman, as a young army officer, arrived in Monterey, Alta California, in 1847. He was immediately captivated by the equestrian skills of the Spanish and Mexican horsemen, vaqueros and caballeros who displayed their horses and talents in the plazas of Monterey and Mission Juan Bautista.

During a visit to Mission Juan Bautista, Sherman was astounded by the low prices for good horses. Since Sherman’s own horse had become lame it became necessary to buy another. There was a fine black stallion that attracted my notice, and after trying him myself, I concluded a purchase. He paid $10, equivalent to $350 today. Memoirs Vol I Early Recollections of California

Sherman notes that horses could be bought at any price, ranging from four dollars to sixteen. In contrast, coffee and sugar were rare and expensive. It seems that Sherman invested in a couple of horses, keeping them in a nearby valley known for its excellent grazing grounds and surrounding hills to protect them from colder weather. To the reader this may seem exorbitant, a luxury of sorts but recall that at that time horses, or their cousin donkeys were the only means of land travel other than walking. An army officer required by his duties to make long trips on horseback would need to have more than one available for travel.

Rereading Sherman’s accounts of his years in northern California always sparks my curiosity and imagination. I sometimes drive, and currently pay upward of $6 per gallon to do so, through the same places where Sherman rode his $10 black stallion nearly two centuries ago. I work in a coast side town north of Monterey, where I occasionally see some horsemen trotting down Main Street or training their Friesian horses for dance competitions along the bluff overlooking the Pacific. I can’t help but smile, imagining Sherman would have been equally delighted by the sight.

Horse Images from Wikimedia Commons

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Art of Living Culture and Value US History

Ellen Ewing Sherman

Who is Ellen Boyle Ewing Sherman?  

Ellen Ewing Sherman 1824-1888

Childhood playmate, foster sister, friend, confidante, advisor and wife of William Tecumseh Sherman. Like her husband she was intelligent, vivacious, opinionated and strong willed. Together they had 8 children, two died –one in infancy– both during the Civil War. Theirs were no ordinary friendship and marriage. It’s a wonder how their lifelong marriage flourished despite differences of opinion, preferences and tastes as well matters of deeply held beliefs. Biographers offer explanations; useful but insufficient. Most agree that Sherman, would not be the person he was without her. Few women would have so many roles as Ellen. That fact alone makes for an interesting story. The complexity of Ellen and Sherman’s interwoven lives created a dynamic force that shaped not only their family but also the destiny of our nation.

Possibly Young Ellen c.1850 (family archives)
Photograph of a Fern 1850 by H.F. Talbot (WikiMediaCommons)
Photography Mid-19th Century

Eleanor Boyle Ewing was born in Lancaster, Ohio in 1824. The daughter of  Thomas Ewing a prominent figure in Ohio-Washington politics and his wife Maria Boyle also from an influential family of Irish descent and unabashedly Roman Catholic in times when there was no small prejudice against the ‘papist’ religion.  The Ewings and Shermans were family friends and neighbors.  When Sherman’s father died suddenly, his mother unable to provide for her eleven growing children alone, gratefully sent her nine year old son ‘Cump’ (as he was called by his family and close friends) to be part of the Ewing household. The Ewings welcomed him warmly and provided for young Sherman in the same way they raised their own children. There were high expectations in education and work ethics but also an abundance of love and affection. Maria Ewing insisted that Cump not only received the same Catholic religious instruction as her children but also be baptized. Sherman later wrote that he was already Christened in infancy and given the name William by his own parents –in addition to name originally given to him by his father in honor of the locally famed Shawnee leader Tecumseh.  But Mrs. Ewing leaving nothing to chance arranged to have a traveling priest baptize nine-year-old Cump on the feast of St. William. 

Ellen, and her siblings and eventually her children also inherited Mrs. Ewing’s religious views. Interestingly it seems that while family members were relentless in their efforts to persuade Sherman to join their religious ranks he with the same stubbornness refused, preferring to adhere to his own belief compass. And yet their loyalty, and endearing affection for one another held fast. “All is fair in love and war” as the saying goes.

W.T. Sherman 1866
Ellen Ewing Sherman 1868
Portraits by G.P.A. Healy (Wikimedia-Public Domain)

Ellen’s and Cump’s different faith perspectives shaped their outlook and approaches to life. Perhaps their lives together were like navigating a canoe in different wind and water currents each paddling with the stronger stroke at different times; often steering in different directions but occasionally working in unison. Ironically adversity was the force that brought these two closer together. Prominent among these was the sudden death of their eldest son Willie who contracted yellow fever after Ellen had brought four of their young children to visit Sherman’s encampment in Mississippi in the summer of 1863 during a depressingly low point of Sherman and his army Vicksburg campaign.  She had hoped that the visit would revise her husband’s spirit. Indeed it did; nine year old Willie and his father enjoyed the time together riding horseback through the camp and inspecting the troops.  All seemed to have gone well until the return trip home via a river steamboat when sickness was spreading among the passengers. Young Willie was dead in two days. Neither of the parents fully recovered from the loss of their son and deep grief remained with them throughout their lives.

Ellen Ewing Sherman
“She has opened her hand to the needy and stretched out her hand to the poor.”

Ellen and her husband were often apart; first as he worked to establish a way of supporting his family and then due to his military career. Finally in retirement they moved to a townhouse in New York City but by then Ellen’s health rapidly declined in the weeks after the move. It seems that Sherman was in disbelief that his wife’s end of life was near. But when a doctor was consulted he accepted the prognosis of congestive heart failure. Then on the morning of November 28 of 1888 while he was in his study he heard the nurse beckon him; his lifelong companion was breathing her last. He ran up the stairs crying out “Wait for me Ellen-no one has ever loved you more”.

There’s still much to glean from their yin-yang fiery relationship. Maybe I’ll do so on further musings. Here I’ll let their youngest son– my great-grandmother’s brother have the last word:

“Between my father and mother there were, of course many differences; but never did their differences interfere with unwavering mutual respect, consideration and affection. With my mother’s faith and its transmissions to their children, my father was always content. And her judgment and advice were always respected by him and frequently deferred to with consequences that entitled her to much of the credit for his successful career.

P. Tecumseh Sherman 1935, Introduction to Ellen Ewing Sherman by Anna McAllister
“In thee O Lord have I hoped”
Calvary Cemetery, St. Louis Mo
“Her children rise up and call her blessed and her husband praiseth her”
Categories
Art of Living Culture and Value US History

New Year’s Eve in Monterey

This is the season of dancing and there has been a good deal of it, in fact one is looked for every Sunday night.

February 3, 1848, Sherman’s Family Letters

Writes Sherman to his family from Monterey California. More than a year earlier, that is New Year’s eve of 1846  he was still en-route by ship to his new assignment. The voyage lasted close to one year.  And the new year celebration of 1846-1847 was marked by a pleasant stretch of “fair wind and truly Pacific sea crossing the equator in Longitude 117 West”. 

Nautical Clock 1759, By Tatters ❀ from Brisbane, Australia – Wikimedia Commons

While the passage to California provided enough adventures to satisfy anyone looking for them, the tasks that lay ahead at first seemed to young Sherman dull with little prospects of career advancement which he deemed essential to eventually supporting a family. The war with Mexico including the battle of Monterey in July 1846 ended by the time Sherman arrived six months later. Thus, instead of participating in combat, he was assigned tedious duties of managing military affairs in an outpost that also served as the port of entry of foreign goods in Alta California.

The young lieutenant’s reaction to his assignment in California was ambivalent.  Letters to his family and future wife reflect his mixed feelings. On the one hand he lamented that there’s no hope for military promotion and more pay now that the Mexican war had ended. On the other, he was clearly enjoying hist post in a bustling  port town still heavily dominated by Spanish and Mexican customs and ways of life.  At that time it seems that theater productions, dances and horse racing far surpass church activity despite the cathedral being one of the oldest and most prominent building of the town. And so, after complaining of the scant career opportunities he reports on the party life and leisure activities even as he critiques the frivolity with his typical ironic humor.

“The officers gave the ‘great ball’ of the season on New Year’s Eve – wrote young Sherman.  ‘You have no doubt heard of the Mexican custom of filling eggshells with cologne and other fragrant water to break upon passers by. Here it is carried to a great extent but confined to the house and chiefly at balls and dances.The shells are mostly filled with gilt and colored paper cut very fine, which broken overhead leave it covered with spangles. The ladies break over the gentlemen’s heads and the reverse, and so great are the liberties taken to accomplish the feat that some from behind will clasp your arms tight whilst others shower on the Cascarones’ (filled eggshells). They do not like the shell filled with perfumed water as it produces stains on the dresses and also causes colds to which these people are very subject. It is polite to avoid a Cascacron and even to grasp a lady’s hand to crush the shell in it, if she be in the act of breaking it, but  when a gentleman gets a Cascaron on his head he is bound to return it which is sometimes quite difficult when the ladies are skilled in dodging. You can scarcely imagine the extent to which this is carried [out]. At a small party a few nights ago, there were upwards of four hundred Cascarones broken among a party of not over twenty-five persons. “

February 3, 1848, Sherman Family Letters
  • Women’s Evening Dress c. 1842 By MET Museum –
  • Men’s Jacket By MET Museum
Mid 19th cent evening wear https://www.metmuseum.org

He continues describing how ‘the ladies’ can spend the whole day preparing the cascarones, which apparently are still in use today in Mexico to mark various celebrations. And he concludes:

I have often laughed to see a whole party of grown men, myself included sitting round a table clipping this stuff in preparation for a coming dance, but the customs of Monterey are as sensible as the customs of other places, and must be respected.

Sherman Family Letters 1848

While cracking egg shells on the heads of our family, friends and neighbors may not be our thing, may our own welcoming the New Year be as festive and safe as Sherman’s in Monterey.

Photo: By Rubina Shrestha
Categories
Art of Living Culture and Value US History

Giving Thanks

Valley of the Yosemite Albert Bierstadt, 1864

“It’s a good world; it is the best we have now.”

Memoirs of W. T. Sherman, Volume II

Sherman gratefully addressed his friends as they gathered to celebrate his 70th birthday. Perhaps feeling a need to give words of wisdom to a younger audience, he offered advice gleaned from his own life’s experience: “I know that like all others you wish to make the world as good as yourselves… . But the first way to reform the community is to reform yourselves. But you have to take the world as it is”.

Realism and optimism. We need both. The first to keep us grounded, the second to reach for dreams. Realism presents conditions and circumstances around us and optimism inspires us to energetically respond to opportunities and challenges we encounter. Healing and hope. We long for both. Several months of a pandemic and a contentious election campaign have left us tired; realizing we need to come together but wondering how we’ll do so.

It’s not always easy but it’s attainable. It comes about when we consider how hope brings possibilities into clear focus and healing restores vision and strength to pursue the difficult good which in this case is to unite so as to confront the challenge of our communities, country and world together. Gratitude may not be the only way for hope and healing to come about, it quickens the process. Giving thanks for what we have and even what we lack is an antidote to bitterness in all its toxic effects.

Every day’s a good day to give thanks. But this month we have two holidays especially set aside; Veterans Day and Thanksgiving Day.

“Toward the close of the war, I have often heard the soldiers complain that the ‘stay-at-home’ men got better pay, bounties and food, than they who were exposed to the dangers and vicissitudes of the battles and marches at the front. The feeling of the solder should be that in every event, the sympathy and preference of his government is for him who fights.”

Memoirs of W. T. Sherman, Vol II
Sherman (front center) and veterans, Chicago 1884, Library of Congress

Sherman’s connection with his comrade in arms and his concern for them afterwards is legendary. During war he fought, ate and camped with them. “Officers should never seek for houses but share the condition of their men.” he instructs. Later he worked to establish pensions and methods of care. After his retirement he welcomed veterans who came to his door seeking help.

Women and men of the armed forces protect our country and freedom. “Home of the free because of the brave” should never escape our memory. In what ways are we showing gratitude not only on the one day set aside to honor veterans but every day? How are veterans being cared for in our families and communities? The elderly, sick and wounded in veterans’ facilities across our country keenly feel this time of social isolation. What can we do to shorten the time or distance for those who are separated from friends and family or more tragically entirely forgotten by them? In what ways are we grateful for the thousands of our military members deployed throughout the world?

Thanksgiving Day has its own winding history in our country. Significant in its establishment is that Lincoln had hoped that a day set aside for giving thanks to the Creator for all good gifts would also bring about the unity of a bitterly divided country in the midst of a civil war. Division still remains a threat. Looking beyond differences and being grateful together won’t resolve all problems but it will help us find solutions more swiftly. Attention and appreciation inspires generosity.

The president elect chose hope and healing as a theme to end the recent campaign and embark on a new chapter for America. He referenced a well-known hymn based on psalm 91. Here I recall a verse of another hymn; –which struck me years ago as a young chorister singing in a performance of Benjamin Britten’s St. Nicolas Cantata Op42:

Ye fearful saints fresh courage take
The clouds ye so much dread
Are big with mercy, and shall break
In blessings on your head

God Moves in A Mysterious Way, A. Cowper 1773, Melody London New

So, sure there are things in this world that need to change. Some dreams though are within reach when, as Sherman says we gratefully take the world as it is and inspired by hope we make it better by reforming ourselves and doing what we can to bring about even a greater good together.

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Art of Living Culture and Value

Memorial Day

At some point during its 150th year history Memorial Day, the holiday commemorating war dead evolved into the unofficial kickoff to summer.  In California the lines between summer and the rest of the year are blurred since are grills fired up and flip-flops worn all year round. In New England Memorial Day marks when you can begin wearing summer whites and eat lobster and hopefully get the grill going. Throughout the country parades, salutes and other commemorations still happen but are eclipsed by traffic jams, sporting events and Memorial Day sales.

The origin of the holiday is unclear but by the end of the Civil War the practice of decorating markers and remembering the fallen in battle was widespread in the North and the South. Undoubtedly many of our parents and grandparents participated in the victory parades after WWII. I remember one Memorial Day in a small New England town—I think I was 8 or 9. The day started at the local cemetery. There a brass quartet of the locals played taps and other musical tributes at the graves of the fallen, their markers already decorated with flags. A parade around the commons followed comprised of no more than 30 people. Leading were the veterans of the two World Wars, the Korean Conflict and the Vietnam War. Behind them were children with decorated tricycles, bikes and Red Flyers. That was the parade. When it was over, we went back home and had a cookout.  

Village Green-Temple, New Hampshire

This year’s Memorial Day is the first national holiday since the global pandemic gripped our lives. When the shut down rolled across the country nine weeks ago we probably never expected being in such a prolonged state of uncertainty and disruption.  The grim reality of 100,000 deaths will reminds us that this plague is not going away anytime soon. On Friday flags flew in memory of those who perished. The New York Times printed the names of 1% of them on the first page of Sunday’s paper. It’s fitting; reminding us of that we’re still at war—this time with an invisible enemy. Heroes fighting to defeat Covid-19 surround us and they give us hope.

How should we remember this Memorial Day? Taps played at a cemetery, perhaps even an outdoor brass quartet at a gazebo while observing social distancing.  Memorial Day services and parades live streamed or broadcasted in other social distancing ways. And of course family cook outs. We honor the fallen of the armed forces for we can never take their sacrifices for granted. But this year we’ll remember those of all ages, and health conditions who succumb to this pandemic including health care responders who sacrificed their lives for us. We won’t forget. This Memorial Day is like no other.

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Art of Living Culture and Value

Navigating Life in Times of Pandemic

boba-jovanovic-nfQo34LLCVY-unsplash
Photo by Boba Jovanovic on Unsplash

At the end of March New York Times reported: “COVID-19 is the largest public health crisis in modern American history. To date more than 17,000 cases have been detected and 200 people have died.” Four weeks later there are 1.5 million confirmed cases and close to 70,000 deaths in the United States alone. It’s the largest crisis our nation has faced in recent history.  It has dramatically changed our world and our lives will not be the same as before.

However, COVID-19 is neither the first pandemic nor the last. A hundred years ago another pandemic generated similar disruptions. Between 1918-1919 fifty-to-one-hundred million people died in a year and a half — 650,000 in the United States. (smithsonianmag.com). Older adults with underlining health conditions are the majority of fatalities of our pandemic. But the majority of lives taken during the 1918-1919 influenza were those of otherwise healthy young adults. Many stricken, soldiers of WWI returning to the States contracted the flu while in Europe. They became sick rapidly while on board closed quarters of ships. Within hours of displaying symptoms, people’s conditions would worsen and they would die.

Camp Devens

While the epidemic reached every part of the country including remote Alaskan villages, Boston and several other U.S. port cities were hit especially hard. It’s not clear why healthy young adults were particularly prone to catching the disease and succumbing to death.  My grandparents were young adults at that time. They survived–or I wouldn’t be here today.  Unfortunately, the stories of how my predecessors persevered are now buried with them. Thus, I’ll have to conjecture based on snippets from historical research and generational storytelling.

Photo by Gabriele Strvinskaite on Unsplash

My great-grandfather Paul Thorndike was a surgeon at Boston City Hospital and an early advocate of meticulous hand washing and the disinfecting of surgical instruments prior to operations. As late as the beginning of the 20th century little was known about how germs spread. Presumably my great-grandfather had contact with people of Boston who had contracted the virus. Maybe he was even one of the specialists brought to Fort Devens 20 miles west of Boston to examine the young soldiers returning to the US with this deadly unknown virus. In any case there’s no record of him contracting the illness and he lived for another twenty years. His wife, my great grandmother Rachel, did not. A second wave of the virus surged in the fall of 1919. She was one of the several thousand who contracted it and died in October of that year. Her obituary omitted the cause of death; focusing rather on details of the funeral. David Brooks commenting on the PBS NewsHour in early March noted that the influenza of 1918-1919 was widespread and swift. People of all ages died within several days of showing symptoms. Families weren’t able to cope with how fast they were losing their loved ones and often they had to bury their own relatives. Brooks’ point was that people came up short either by lack of financial resources or by circumstances less blameless; the nation wanted to move quickly past the tragic state of affairs.

  • Helen Allingham
  • Anna Thorndike
  • Rachel Thorndike with her father

Paul and Rachel Thorndike’s youngest daughter, Anna, my grandmother, was in France volunteering with the Red Cross when her mother got sick and died. Since travel was still by ship in those days she didn’t return home in time for the burial.  A few years later, Nan met her future husband, John Rock, who graduated from Harvard Medical School in 1918. Earlier he had tried to enlist in the army to fight in the Great War but failed to qualify. Strangely, it appears from his journals he had little if anything to do with providing medical assistance during the pandemic. After graduating he began studies and work specializing in the fields that eventually shaped his long medical practice and research in gynecology and obstetrics including for the working poor of the tenement slums of Boston. Helen Allingham, my father’s mother migrated from New Brunswick, Canada and worked as a nurse’s aid. What were her stories? Facing death daily? Or perhaps caring for the sick in other hidden ways. Who knows? Her stories, like those of my maternal grandparents and their parents from those years, are also forgotten. As a child I remember that she would insist that hand washing, Cream of Wheat and cod liver oil were the best ways to boost the immune system. It never entered my ten year old brain to ask her why.

Two of my grandparents died before I was born or shortly thereafter. The other two were alive while I was writing high school and college essays on what makes for a meaningful life. But it never occurred to me to ask people around me who had lived full purposeful lives how they did so. Maybe that’s still true nowadays; it doesn’t occur to us to ask those who are older and presumably wiser how they faced challenges when they were our age. On the other hand, maybe a pandemic can actually wake us of out somnolence. We can think to ask questions that matter. What can I learn from my ancestors? Maybe I would ask Paul Thorndike and John Rock how and why they chose medicine and what helped them persist in finding solutions to dire human conditions. I would ask Rachel what was it like to care for her own parents when they died. I would ask my grandmother Nan about driving ambulances in post war France and my grandmother Helen about nursing with little training and resources during a pandemic. What can I do to transform knowledge into an art of living of one’s own shaping? How do my decisions and behavior impact the lives of the people around me? Do I care?

If there were ever a time to reflect on what it means to live an intentional, meaningful or caring life it would be now during a crisis that impacts everyone of us. First responders and health care works show us how to strengthen resilience and cultivate compassion. Data may determine public health policy and even best practice for preventing spread of a virus but it doesn’t show me how to care for people around me. Data doesn’t teach me how to be kind and merciful.   We may not be faced with such epic moments of life and death. But we all are faced with the challenge of going beyond the froth of a superficial living and navigating into the deep; the wind and waves of a live well lived. Choosing to do so will make all the difference.

Photo by Jordan Madrid on Upsplash